Starting a new relationship can be magical; a whirlwind of excitement between two new lovers. The thrill of getting to know each other, the butterflies, the anticipation of what the future holds for you as a couple. Yet starting a new relationship can have a dark side; the guilt.
Perhaps you’ve been betrayed, rejected or abused by your previous partner. Maybe your loved one passed away and you’ve struggled with grief. You may have decided to end your last relationship and are dealing with the consequences. Children and grandchildren may even be in the picture giving you other people to consider.
There’s a number of reasons why people feel guilty about starting a new relationship, but should you feel sinful for looking for a new romance? In short, probably not. As we get older and gain more responsibilities, we tend to put our own happiness on the backburner when it comes to love, especially after a death, divorce or split. Many mature men and women unjustly feel remorseful about satisfying their natural needs and putting themselves back on the dating scene.
If you are feeling guilt concerning starting a new relationship, ask yourself – am I prepared to start dating again? Before you even consider what your ex, friends or family might think or say, it is important to determine if you are completely ready to enter the world of dating again. These five questions may help you to decipher whether your bad conscience is justified, or if you’re beating yourself up unnecessarily.
Now is the perfect moment to embrace the person you are and really look after number one. Once you’ve spent ample time being single, you will realise what is truly important in your life and this help to define what it is you’re looking for. Rushing from one relationship to another can be catastrophic; it is essential that you take the You time to clarify who you are and what you want.
Have you really let go? Not truly letting go can cause men and women alike a whole world of unnecessary grief and guilt. Whether your ex has passed away or you’re now divorced, it is critical that you accept you are no longer an item as you once were. If there’s still a little part of you that holds on to your ex, you may feel like you’re betraying them.
Are you ready to meet someone completely new? If you step back onto the dating scene looking for a carbon copy of your ex, you’re not ready. If everyone you meet you subconsciously measure against your ex, you’re not ready. As previously mentioned; let go! It’s all too easy to romanticize our past relationships and magically forget our ex’s annoying habits, bad manners and irritating flaws.
By all means, remember your ex fondly if you can, but never judge a new potential partner based on past experiences. It’s not fair to them, start each new date with a clean slate. On the other hand, don’t allow bad past relationship experiences to taint your new one. You may have been hurt, tricked, abused, neglected, lied to, stolen from, cheated on – as difficult as it is, you must learn from whatever it is your ex did to you, and move on. Rebuilding your trust after a toxic relationship can be hard, but try to see the best in others and don’t allow your past to shadow your present.
Feeling guilty about starting a new relationship is all too common, especially amongst the mature singles, but don’t allow guilt to determine your future happiness. When you are truly ready to begin dating again, you will know. Listen to your heart and may all of your dreams come true.View All