Dating in your midlife can be daunting, but it doesn’t have to be. The secret to success is preparing yourself prior to putting yourself out there, that way you’ll be armed the essential tools to make the dating experience an enjoyable one and ultimately get you want; somebody special to spend your life with. So, how can you succeed when you’re dating over 50?
First things first; what excites you? What are your interests? What are you passionate about? These are all very important questions to ask yourself when considering dating in your midlife. By determining what gets you going, you are far more likely to find a genuine match with someone who shares similar interests. For some of us, this may be a tricky exercise, you may like lots of stuff from holidaying to reading, watching movies to hiking, so try narrowing it down by elimination. The more you know about your own likes and dislikes the more likely you are to meet people who have the same things in common with you, thus more likely to have satisfying dates. By being crystal clear to yourself about who you are instantly saves you time and energy when it comes to dating unsuitable men or women.
Take a step back and look at your life. You may have a job, a house, children, grandchildren, hobbies; you are most likely a lot more settled physically, emotionally and mentally than you were when you dated as a youngster. Realise that the pressure of dating to define yourself is now gone; you’ve built your little world – be proud of it and who you are! Dating in your midlife is very different to dating back in the day. Dating should now be an exciting, positive experience that compliments all of the other areas of your life; not dominate it. Allow dating to enhance your lifestyle and remember to not lose sight of everything else.
Imagine you were signed up to run a marathon – you wouldn’t just show up to do it on the day with no training would you? This is the same for dating. In order to truly enjoy and prevail in the dating game, one must undertake ongoing training in the form of looking after Number 1. Start by making yourself feel good on the outside; new haircut, go to the gym, get a massage. Consider your diet, your quality of sleep, how active you are. Once you begin to focus on you and take care of yourself you’ll gradually start to feel amazing on the inside and this will also shine through to potential dates. You might be an older woman dating or an over 50 man, but feeling good in yourself is the first step to finding the beautiful things in life.
Leave your expectations with your baggage at the door. It’s all too easy to get overly excited about someone only to be severely disappointed when they are not the perfect date we fantasized them to be. Imagine, instead of entering the dating scene expecting to find Mr. or Mrs. Right in everyone you meet, you simply see each encounter as a chance to meet someone new and have a few laughs. This takes the pressure off reaching the destination of finding a partner and allows you to enjoy the dating journey. And yes, we all have a past and we all have our problems but dating isn’t a therapy session. Never allow yourself to divulge in your personal, work, home, family, finance, ex – whatever – issues when dating. Keep the conversations light and fun.
With this knowledge applied, you can have the confidence to get out there and get back in the dating game. Whilst the advice here is sure to kick start an enjoyable dating experience for you, it’s not a fool proof plan. The world of dating can be a tough one filled with awkward moments, waiting anxiously for phone calls, having to let someone down, being let down and so much more – but if you enter with an open heart and open mind with little expectation, the good times are likely to far outweigh the bad.